Movies That Shouldn't Be

Some movies should just never be made. If you're a movie fan like me I know that you've seen some trailers and said to yourself, "Why? Why would they make that movie?"

There's seems to be a trend in Hollywood right now of making movies that are destined to be ridiculously bad. You’ve got to wonder what executive is green-lighting these projects and how they still have a job. I mean, come on, I am fairly confident that most educated movie fans could sit around all day reading scripts and do a fairly good job selecting screenplays that had a chance at becoming quality movies. So, where do these crappy movies come from?

The discovery that spurned this particular post was this: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning is currently filming. Why? The remake of the original was great, I loved it. But leave well enough alone. These prequels are out of hand and nobody cares what about the story behind Leatherface. If anything it will sort of demystify him, make him less frightening and certainly less real. This movie is not being directed by Tobe Hooper, the man responsible for the cult classic and the director behind Steven Spielberg’s immensely frightening Poltergeist.

So I started thinking, what other movies have I seen in the last year that just shouldn’t be? Well, here they are:

• Big Momma’s House 2


• Son of the Mask


• Into the Blue (an admirable attempt at getting Jessica Alba in a bikini, but still…


• Cheaper by the Dozen 2


• Supercross: The Movie (Here’s a slap in the face)


• Hide and Seek (It’s easy to make Dakota Fanning creepy, be creative)


• Darkwater (Don’t import Japanese horror movies and destroy them)


• Elektra


• The Dukes of Hazzard (So hard to say this with Jessica Simpson in tight shorts)


• Get Rich or Die Tryin’


• Aeon Flux


• Syrianna (Or anything even remotely connected to George Clooney)


• The Brother’s Grimm (Good idea, nice set design, totally craptastic screenplay)


• Yours, Mine and Ours


• In the Mix


• The Fog (I hate it when they destroy classics)


• Good Night, and Good Luck (See the George Clooney Rule)

I know there’s more. Let’s hear about them! In the meantime, take a look at this funny take on movie bombs by the folks at rottentomatoe.com.